I had occasion recently to attend a function where the
attendees were required to dress up.
This was no problem for me. I have
two suits, one for winter and one for summer, and I plucked from my closet the
summer one. I wore my best white shirt
and a nifty pink bow tie with flowers on it.
Annette had bought a simple dress of an attractive color and a pretty
sweater to go over it. I thought we
looked nice.
When I arrived at the shindig, I was as flabbergasted, as
fogies often are, at how things had changed while I wasn’t looking. I noticed the featured element of today’s
style seems to be skin. Total nudity
will never be fashionable until someone discovers a way to make money out of
it, but revealing garments are the rage.
I suspect today’s
dress shoppers are influenced by “Dancing with the Stars,” and the red carpet
at the Academy Awards. The trouble is
the attendees at these televised events have bodies they labor upon daily with
diet and exercise. If these methods
fail, there are procedures collectively known as ”work.” Limbs, necks, tummies, and breasts are
shapely, firm, and upholstered with flawless skin.
This is not the case with some of the women present at the
do to which I was in attendance. They
seemed to have chosen garments that the reminded them of professional beauties without considering what the revealing elements were liable to reveal. Skirts that
my out-of-date vocabulary might term micro-mini fluttered provocatively above
legs that had long been absent from the treadmill. One damsel seemed to have been recently
jumped upon by a large dog as there were red scratch marks up and down her
thighs.
Many of the gowns seemed to have been acquired at
considerable expense, but they were cheap compared to those worn by the
celebrities their purchasers wished to emulate. There was no designer to match
dress style to body type. No seamstress made
alterations so the fabric lay in attractive folds over the flesh it was meant
to conceal. One woman bulged alarmingly inside a diaphanous dress that must
have been extremely difficult to zip up. It was cut low, revealing almost all
of her enormous breasts, the right one
of which was decorated with a rose tattoo, which may have been provocative
twenty years ago.
No comments:
Post a Comment